Does.

i want to say im fine, but that would be a lie and i'm not really fond of lying... Im not horrible but i have a few things going on that makes me seem horrible. im not it's just hard because i cant really vent to anyone, or i feel as though I cant... I mean i can come into this blog and vent but what good is that going to do? I end up crying and then i feel pathetic because i vented to the internet and cried alone in my room... i mean i feel as though i can't be upset anymore about shauna because it was 6 months ago... i feel bad when i complain about my parents, i have a ton of issues with them but am i whiny good for nothing kid because of the fact they make me want to ball my eyes out?... i miss one week of church and i feel odd and distant from god, does this make me a bad christian?... I put on a front when im with friends, i laugh and smile when really i just want to cry out and say no im not okay, does this make me a lier? Does te fact that half the time i want to cry out and just curl in a ball and ball my eyes out make me a lier when i say im fine? because the way i feel right now is nothing compared to the way ive been before, does that make me pathetic? I don't know what to do anymore..